Tears for Fears

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7JvL2ap3Cg

I LOVED the Disney movie Dumbo when I was very little. It was right up there with "The Little Mermaid", "Annie", "Marry Poppins", and "Sister Act" (what?). I could watch it over and over and still love it. The song I YouTube'd above is called "Baby Mine", and though my memory of the Dumbo story is a bit foggy, I just remember it is when baby Dumbo is separated from his mom, and he is able to have a breif and tender reunion with her. As a very small child, this scene made me cry every time, because of how sad I would be if I didn't get to be with my mom. I remember being inconsolable when she would drop me off at the babysitters to go to work (Gosh that must have been sheer HELL for her). But that was JUST how important she was (and still is) to me. The song always had a special place in my heart, and I always thought I would sing it to my baby one day.

Somehow, in the fog and chaos of my pregnancy and the first year of my first child's life, I completely forgot this until last night. Desparate for good lullabyes to sing to my girl, I started out with "Goodnight" by The Beatles (White Album- Ringo sings it). Then I remembered "Baby Mine" and attempted to sing it (mostly had to hum it). Even just humming that beautiful song the memories and associations with it made the tears rush out uncontrollably. You know when you can keep your composure, keep your voice steady so as not to sob, but the tears literally pour out of your eyes like a faucet? It was like that. But it wasn't just the memories that made me weep; but it was the fact that I now was holding my own beautiful, sleeping daughter in my arms. I actually am a mother now. The emotions were/are just so intense. Okay, so maybe it is that time of the month, and maybe I am hormonal. The feelings are the same; there's just more tears ;)

I did okay humming the song again while putting Maddy to bed tonight, until I came downstairs and YouTubed the video. But lets just say, this completely solidified my thoughts on having an Elephant theme for Maddy's room. And I am SO buying her Dumbo for her birthday.