A Close Call

Yesterday was Ross's last day off before starting his new job. We decided to pack up the kids and head down to the nearby mall to get coffee and finish up some Christmas shopping. As usual, any outing with kids is a big production and multiple stops to eat, clean, potty, and play turned it into a three hour excursion. The shoppers seemed crabby and the kids were becoming that as well; so we purchased what we were able to find for our loved ones (including Christmas PJ's for the kiddies) and headed on home. It was 2:57pm when I looked at my phone as Ross started up the car to head home.

We had to stop at the gas station on 82nd Drive and we heard and saw sirens heading up I-205 like crazy. "Something big must have happened, there's cops and ambulances going crazy out there..." Ross said as he got back into the car.

When we walked in the door, both of our phones were ringing and text alarming like crazy. I looked down and had 3 missed calls. Ross turned on the news as I answered the phone call from my brother in law checking in to make sure we weren't at Clackamas Town Center, as there had been a shooting and the killer had not been found yet. I stood there in shock and began to tremble. After beginning to process these facts; most importantly the fact that we were home safe and unharmed; I started making calls and texts to our immediate family and let them know we were safe. I called my friend who had sent me two texts and frantically called twice. I texted my friend who works at the mall and found out that she was safe and had left just before the shooting as well. They say the shooting happened around 3:20pm; less than 30 minutes after we left.

I have been impacted tremendously by this in two major ways; one positive and one negative:

Positive:  I am so profoundly thankful to God for protecting my family and I yesterday; as well as two of my friends who happened to be there at the same time we were. There is no coincidence. We had already stayed out past the kid's nap times and we easily could have gone up to the food court to feed our cranky kids (the shooting occurred in the food court). We just decided we had been there long enough.
This incident is a great reminder and lesson for me that God is (in fact) in ultimate control! As much as I would like to think I am the one in charge of my family's safety; He is. Besides; it was my decision to go to the mall yesterday. I am admittedly a control freak and constantly worry about things like my kids getting sick or getting in a car accident if someone else is driving them. I am the ones who took my babies to a mall that was about to become a crime scene, but our Lord protected us and lead us home just in time. Wow.

Negative: Paradoxically, I am now more fearful of being in big public places. Since the attack on 9/11/01, I have been mildly afraid to be in airports, convention centers, and other large places full of people. It didn't stop me from going; but it would linger on my mind when going into those places. As of now; I am not sure when I will feel comfortable stepping into large stores or events with my children. I would go alone, but not with the babes.
This SO contradicts my first point, because I know that if I truly trusted Jesus, then I would not be afraid. I was supposed to go to the same mall on Friday to have Santa pictures taken with the kids, but I just don't know if I can. Ross, who is sometimes just annoyingly wise and faithful, said that we absolutely go. He said he would hate to see businesses and families suffer more than they already will; and that I should have faith that God is protecting our family. Not only is he right, but logically the odds of there being ANOTHER shooting there are pretty much nonexistent. We will see.

Are you going shopping in any malls soon after what happened at Clackamas Town Center yesterday?